We were snowshoeing a week ago and passed this snowman on the side of the trail. It had arms, eyes, nose, belly, hat… but no mouth! Well actually, it did have a mouth but it’s ‘mouth’ had fallen onto it’s chest. This sight got me thinking about how we use our mouth and what impact ‘loosing it’ might have on our daily life! Eating popped into my head first! Certainly talking, smiling, kissing, praising, pouting to name just a few other ‘jobs’ our mouths play. As a counselor I have worked with men and women who have lost their mouths. By this I mean due to fears, they have learned to not say what they needed to say to take care of themselves. Often the fears were real as a child or adolescent, but that adaptive behavior was carried into their adult lives. The negative results: not standing up for one’s self, failing to reveal preferences, failing to set appropriate boundaries with others, difficulty in making positive decisions, etc.
Those closest to me would say I don’t have a problem setting boundaries or expressing my thoughts/desires, and this is true for the most part…even to others’s detriment! So I am working on NOT speaking into everything that annoys me and praising instead of picking on the problems or people. Questions to Consider….
- Tell about a time you ‘lost your mouth’. How did it help or hurt you?
- What behaviors do you need to change, to use your mouth in a better way for you? For others?
- Who can you support in finding and ‘using their mouth’ in unjust situations? Consider sharing this blog with them.